A round of achievements

Have I ever told you how proud I am of my boys? This past week has been a big one for Matthew.

Last Friday, Matthew took part in the Stockholm chess championships for fourth graders. His class has participated in a number of tournaments throughout the year and had qualified for the national finals, which were on May 10 (they placed 30th in the nation, but I may have said that a while back....).

Matthew did so well in the previous tournaments that he was invited to take part in last Friday's tournament, where rankings were based on individual achievement.




At the end of the tournament, Matthew was ranked 82nd out of all current fourth grade chess players (his teacher say they started with around 7,000). A round of chess anyone?



Whenever I play chess with Lucas or Matthew, I invariably lose. Always. Without a doubt. And I'm not even trying to let them win. I lose. They're so supportive though, always coming with comments like "That's ok, mom. You're getting better. You just need to practice!" Yeah, right!

Yesterday, Matthew had his last judo lesson of the season. He came home with a broad smile on his face and a bright new belt around his middle.


And if you're wondering, no, I don't try to beat him at judo at all!

Feeling blessed

This past Sunday was Mother's Day here in Sweden, two weeks after it occurs in the US and Denmark, but no less important.

Sure, I'm a mother and I enjoy being celebrated with a special day that recognizes my mommy status. I adore the beautiful drawings Matthew and Lucas made for me this year. I relish the many extra hugs I received that day. I welcomed the extra effort everyone made to be nice. Furthermore, it goes without saying that I am incredibly happy for the gift all of my guys gave me.

For me, though, Mother's Day is more than these things. It is a chance to reflect on all of the amazing mothers and mothers-to-be in my life and all of the things they have taught me, shown me, shared with me since I was just a baby. On such days, I wish I could give every one of them a hug and a thank you.

These moms, and many more, have been and remain an integral, important part of my life (in advance, I beg forgiveness for everyone whose name I have missed -- there are so many.):

My own mom (without a doubt, the best mom on earth)

Grandma H and Grandma S

Gitte

Momma

Mormor

Kathi

Michelle

Aunt Ro

Aunt Pam

Aunt Karen

Aunt Alice

Nicole

Shawn

Trish

Pia

Ulla

Anne-Grete

Lotte

Dorte

Helen

Ilse

Ingelise

Marlene

Alima

Tanja

Charlotte

Fanny

Marcela

Marissa

Eva

Lubna

Karin

Leticia

Minna

Nancy

Aunt Lauretta

Doctors, doctors everywhere!

A few weeks ago, Matthew failed a vision test given at school. Given the optical geneology of Matthew's parents, this did not come as a great surprise. In fact, Matthew's need for glasses comes at exactly the same age as mine. He was moved to the front of the classroom in order to better see the whiteboard, and then off to the optometrist he went.

In my opinion, Matthew's new glasses make him even more handsome than before.

Last week, Nicholas and I had an appointment with a new pediatrician. The goal of this appointment was to ascertain why he is so far below the average in weight gain. He currently weighs around 7.5 kg, which puts him at only the 10th percentile, while he is 72 cm long, which is in the 95th percentile. (It is worth nothing that both Matthew and Lucas are very tall and very skinny...)

Does he look that skinny to you?

This doctor was, at least in my opinion, not very friendly. I don't know if my perception of the situation was caused by the language barrier. Whatever the case, our conversation went something like this:

Doctor: What does he eat?

Me: Let's see. Baby cereal and formula in the morning. Veggies and some kind of starch for lunch. An afternoon snack of fruit. Meat, veggies and starch for dinner, along with some formula. And I breastfeed him twice during the day and several times during the night.

Doctor: You feed him during the night?!?!?!

Me: Yes. When he wakes up.

Doctor: You let him eat during the night?!?!?!

Me: Yes. Why? Is that wrong?

Doctor: Well, you're basically feeding him 24 hours a day. That's not good for him.

Me: Really? The nurses keep telling me to feed him whenever he's hungry.

Doctor: You have trained him to eat during the night. Now you have to teach him that he doesn't need to eat during the night.

Me: OK. I'll try.

Doctor: Also, I think you're starving him -- he doesn't get enough nutrition during the day [note from the author: in my mind, this contradicts with the feeding him all the time argument, but since I am not medically educated, I could be wrong]. Obviously, you have no breastmilk for him and he's just using you for comfort. You should stop breastfeeding him and feed him five full meals a day.

Me (now close to tears and still reeling from the starving my child accusation): Really? I don't want him to be hungry! I'll try.

She then shipped Nick off for an allergy test. He is, indeed, allergic to milk. In addition, we learned that he is allergic to eggs, but (thankfully) not to fish. So the (friendly) doctor and I agreed on a milk and egg-free diet, which he was on already anyway.

After leaving the office, I called Steen, and then I called mom and dad. I needed a reality check. Was it true that I am such a terrible mother? Had I starved my child? Had I done something wrong? With their reassurances that I had not, I re-examined the course of the visit and have decided that while I will implement the five full meals a day plan (which is basically just one snack more a day than he was getting before), I will not stop breastfeeding my child. (The World Health Organization , I believe, recommends at least some breastfeeding for the entire first year of a baby's life, As does the Swedish government!)

Therefore, Nick now gets a morning feed, breakfast, morning snack, lunch, afternoon snack, dinner and a bedtime feed. We return to Ms. Happy Doctor in a month, although I think I'm going to ask to see a different pediatrician this time. We just didn't hit it off right.

On Friday, Steen and I decided that it was indeed time for him to start learning to sleep through the night. Actually, that part of things has gone quite well. He's still waking a few times a night, but I just get up, give him his pacifier, cover him up and we all go back to sleep.

And he remains a happy, friendly baby, which I hope he will always be.

On a very exciting note, Matthew's class placed 30th in the national chess finals. And even more happy news -- Matthew was ranked first in his class and is therefore going to play in a special tournament of the 95 best fourth-grade chess players on Friday, May 23. He is proud -- rightly so -- as are we!!!

Nick and I had our first playtime out on the front lawn on Friday, which is the subject of today's photo of the day!

Down under

If distance were not an issue, i.e. if I could see my U.S.-based family any time I liked without having to travel across days and night, and if there was a true spirit in the world that endorsed the free movement of people and goods across national borders, I would chose to live in Australia. That country has moved me.

Nicholas, Gitte and I have just returned from a two-week trip down under.We took the trip in order to meet, hold and play with my new niece, Annabelle, and her big sister, Emma. One smile from either of those two little girls will melt anyone's heart, and I can already see that many young men will find themselves madly in love with them in the coming years (they'll have to watch out for Carsten -- he's got a plan for any guy who comes a'knockin'...).
I can only speak for myself on this trip (well, I guess I could speak for Nicholas too, although he wouldn't be able to confirm or deny anything). I had an absolutely amazing time! My sister-in-law Michelle and I spent a great many moments chatting, sharing much-needed and much-deserved coffee breaks at Gloria Jean's and Starbuck's (three cheers for Very Vanilla Lattés, Michelle! And for coconut-chocolate milkshakes, svigermor!) and watching our children get to know each other.
Having this time with Michelle made me realize even more how much I miss having her, Carsten and the girls closer. I am so glad that we are good friends, though -- watching her has reinforced my own impression of the value of patience, which she has tons of, and I so enjoyed her - and her family's - company. Nicholas spent a few days watching his Uncle Carsten and trying to get him to play all wild with him like Steen does. Nick might have been thinking that Carsten was his dad (they do look a lot alike) and he was totally confused about Carsten's preference for Emma and Annabelle. He got over it quickly though, and instead threw a great deal of his energy into rolling around on his uncle and aunt's floor, trying to grab Annabelle's hair, and snatching Emma's toys whenever he got the chance. Emma is an angel, though, and she was always very good to share with Nicholas and find something to entertain him.

Carsten and Michelle took us on a three-day trip to the beach, where we rented an apartment with an ocean view. Michelle and I wandered around, shopping, drinking coffee and talking, while Gitte, Carsten and Carsten's friend Bo spent some time on the beach and in the water. Nick spent a bit of time on the beach too, but we had to leave when he started trying to eat the sand.

We also took a day trip up into the hills near Brisbane, where the beauty of the country becomes even more breathtaking, with types of forests and fauna that I doubt are replicated elsewhere on the planet. Our drive through the hills was followed by an absolutely amazing Italian lunch in a little town one would otherwise probably never visit. I will, however, have to go back again just to have another bite!
I love Australia -- the people and their laid-back style, the variety of cultures, the incredible landscapes, the animals (except for the creepy crawly kind). I hope we can visit again soon!

Gitte and I stopped in Singapore on the way down and back, spending one night each way at the Marina Mandarin hotel. On the way home, we spent our Singapore day lounging by the pool, enjoying the sunshine and just relaxing. It was good to reconnect with my mother-in-law, and watch how she and Nicholas adored each other. I could have never made the trip without her help. I feel very lucky to have in-laws that I care so much about and get along with so well!p.s. A great-big thank you goes directly from Nicholas to Uncle Carsten for building the highchair for him!